Chocolate + Coconut = Crack

Good morning, class! Would everyone please take their seats?

Readers, if you’ve learned anything here, I hope it’s these two things:

  1. Acceptable Chocolate-to-Fruit Ratio
  2. Yummy Food = Crack

The other day Miss Piece of the Piehole sent me a link to a blog with lots of delicious food.

Because of my recent coconut kick, I made The Domestic Rebel’s Almond Joy Blondie Bars. Except I used more chocolate…of course.

Even though the recipes don’t specifically list “crack” as an ingredient, I’m sure it’s in there. Why? Science.

Chemistry 101

I suspect that when certain foods come into contact with each other, a chemical reaction occurs and results in an addictive substance known as crack.

For those of you mathematically inclined, write this equation down. It’s even more important than E = MC².

Chocolate³ + Coconut = Crack

That’s just one example. Here’s another:

When the amount of Cake ≤ the amount of Icing = Crack

Physics 101

For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.

Action: Eating food with crack in it.

Reaction: Eating even more food with crack in it.

Reaction to the Reaction: Expanding thighs.

Favorite Comment from Previous Post: “I vote turbo-slut, but with nerds! You’ll be doing a good deed while getting knocked up and staying disease free! And your kid will probably be a genius, there’s really no downside.”—Cocktails at Tiffanys

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About thoughtsappear

I'm about to have my first child...who I promised to Rumpelstiltskin. Shhhhhh.... Hopefully he won't find out. View all posts by thoughtsappear

51 responses to “Chocolate + Coconut = Crack

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